Anscetors Mandala

6.23.2013 ~Joshua Tree

I’ve come to this place deep inside me where it feels like there is thorn or block obstructing the flow of life’s greatest gifts and rewards.  I kept sensing dispar or just wanting to quit….everything.  I’m tired of doing, being active, taking action to move life along for the sake of accomplishment and success.  My committment to my dreams, projects and circles was waning.  Motivation weakening.  Inspiration becoming cynical.

I have everything to be grateful for.  My dome home is upon completion, my drum medicine continues momentum and friends, family and romance  are flourishing…the message I kept hearing was “Let go and allow.  Surrender.  Let go, let go, let go.”  Such an uncomfortable place in my psyche, body and soul.

Mini rituals alleviate  the angst…on with it…..let it go!!!!  Praying, meditating, calling on associates to reveal a message on my behalf led me to this message from the Ancestors.

“And so, the dream came true. What say you NOW Goddess?”

We say our Heart’s Desire, this dream, is nothing more than our ecstatic elation born from imagination. We imagined so much more and thought all we had to do is dream it awake. It’s a bit uncomfortable as the dream continues to reveal itself. Especially uncomfortble in the allowing for revalations.

“This is the growth of our humanity’s journey. What will you do NOW Goddess?”

We give up!

 

 

 

In this moment, I give up!  I surrender. I let go.  This is what the moment is calling for NOW and from this I am reminded that giving up IS being alive.

To be alive is a birth rite that we all embody.  Embody this rite; show up, be accountable and present. Being present, most of all, is the acknowledgment of being alive.

WE GIVE UP AND WE ARE ALIVE!!

 

 

Birthing it easy

Birthing  Easy
October 14, 2012
As we approach and enter this time in humanities evolution, the cosmos and prophecies of potent spiritual cultures say that we are stepping into our fullest potential of who we are to become. All that we aspire to be and want to bring to our children, our communities and the world is happening now. This is the time when what no longer serves us must be let go. For if not, our true essence of who we are that is emerging with great force to LIVE, will emerge with more discomfort.

Sometimes I think I may have taken on more than I can handle and get tired of being part of the “strong and inspiring” dream club. Doing life my way and out of the box only to follow my heart’s desires and Spirits calling ***breathe*** is the only way I continue to find the peace within.

How do we find the endurance that called us to the dream we are meant to meet?

Let us make it easy on ourselves. Do our work to LET IT GO. Walk into nature and appreciate the beauty of life. Seek support from someone who may simply hold your head on their shoulder and let you cry. Light a candle and take a bath. Do something wonderful for ourselves!!!
Seek the silence between the beats and pray, meditate, walk and listen for the stillness.

Peace Within~18″ elk hide, cedar hoop, sterling silver, abalone shell

This is the Peace that is born from letting go.

i got scared

July 11, 2012

i got scared

i got so scared

working numbers

digits

i got so scared

cause it wasn’t adding

up

i  got so scared

about it being

enough

i got so scared

i cried out for

help

i got so scared

i heard “pull yourself

together”

i  got so scared

and remembered to

pray

I got so scared

even though it’s all a

lie

Drum Medicine

Maria Theresa in reverance to the Cedar for her drum hoop

I recently traveled to Mexico to sit, journey and remember my true potential.  In the months preceding, fear had taken me and thrown me into submission….a place where I cried out for help to never return.  While in Tequisquiaspan, Traditional Plant Medicine carrier,  Maria Theresa Venezuela, became my guide and guardian as I embarked on a journey to clear a deep seeded fear that has plagued me and others from fully becoming our authentic selves and living our birth right as passed down through our lineage.  Ceremonies of Sweat Lodge and Plant Medicine gave way to profound life changing events which occurred within me  and, there is no mistake, within  all of humanity as well.  For I believe, we are each a reflection of our humanity and all of life.

Rosario Sarria and her new birth

“The Drum beat begins and a connection to the beat of Mamma, to  Humanity and, to Pappa create a sound wave vortex that leads us to the sound between the beats and other realms.  Webs are woven and then the web begins to expand into the fifth dimension as it forms into a bridge, a tunneling spiral igniting a momentum to touch the Celestials and bore deep into the Earth at the same time.  The ground shivers and shakes as bolts of lightning shoot up out of the Earth acknowledging the light beam of love we have sent her.  Colors and swirls of light spin in and around our heads as the Spiraling Infinity soars to the Heavens and down into the Earth as our hearts remain to be the point of conception.”

“The time is now  to step into our fullest potential of power in this lifetime.

Come!!! Be  in Ceremony (celebration) of being all that you can be.  Drum Medicine!!“

on the steps of the Temple of Sun, Teotihuacan

Do not be fooled.  This BIG THING can look like anything even if it’s as simple as re-learning how to walk on the Earth with a confident stride.  Embrace with Gratitude to be alive.

remembering how to walk again

XI Strength

 

March 28, 2012

XI Strength

What a glorious life I lead.

(“I feel scared”)

Waking to what seems to perpetual sunny days.

(“I don’t want to get out of bed”)

Enjoying the freedom the kitties have in this expansive desert .

(“Next life time, I’m going to be a cat”)

Barefoot on the land.

(**sigh**)

Sharing the love of community…..building with the Earth….shaping our Dreams into form.

(“Sometimes I just need my own time and space”)

Talking circle before we begin our day ignites transparency to hold me accountable.

(“Overwhelm, fear…emotional purging”)

Stone of Gratitude passed around the circle.

(“Thank you, thank you, thank you!”)

Tears, laughter.

(“The beauty of Talking Circle”)

Where are my shoes?

(“funny crew”)

Where is my hat?

(“funny, funny crew!”)

I draw a card from the MotherPeace deck:  XI Strength

(“Lady of the Beast, she who tames through sheer spritual force.”)

 

Her Water Broke

I find it quite uncanny that the coulds seem to roll in when I soak a full elk or deer hides in water in preparation for making drums.   The process begins with i

immersing an elk or deer hide into a large barrel of water.  Then the hard, dry hide will begin to hydrate into a soft, pliable skin.

Blessing the Hides

The more I reflected back on the last decade in honoring this sacred craft that works with such a powerful animal, it either rains during the time of preparation or during the time of actual crafting the drums.  The last spurt of drum making in October, Coyote howled in the distance as the hides began to surrender to the water and the following day the Thunder Beings made themselves present while I was cutting hides at a location called Rabbit Run.  Quite an appropriate name during an oncoming Thunder storm!!

I’ve been asked if I get creep out by handling the wet skin of an animal after it has soaked up the water and begins to smell of primal life.  Funny….I hadn’t thought about it until the question was posed to me and upon reflection I get a bit of a charge of life reborn and my creativity begins to awaken once again.

So, as I craft and prepare for drum making in this timing of 2012, in the tradition of the Quero Apache, the first full moon of the year was Black Water Dragon  greeting us into a New Reality.  I will be soaking hides tonight after I complete this writing and there are clouds in the distant mountains.

“We prepare for the births that will carry our heartfire into the depths of true nature.  Water flows brings the activation.”

***I  invite you to visit the Indian Store in Vista on Feburary 18, 2012 from 12pm to 5pmish where I will be preparing hides, lace and hoops.***

In Gratitude and Love,

Lisa

Reality or Projection

I have just spent the past four weeks in the North East.  A very dense and populated landscape of urban life with pockets respite along the Long Island Sound and small suburb parks.

Upon my arrival, it seemed that there was a mass of zombie like energy glazed upon the faces and bodies of those whom I encountered and the dense heaviness of  darkness of winter weighed thick in the air.  A big contrast to the desert in the South West full of sunlight and winds of cleansing change.  Bright and fresh.

Daily practice of yoga, meditation and salt scrub showers kept my Spirit light yet as time grew closer to the Winter Solstice on December 21st and my birthday on December 23rd, my shadow grew and began to weigh me down.   Dragging my shadow along for the inevitable ride, I sought out a place of refuge, a metaphysical bookstore.  This is where my journey back to the LIGHT began.

I was invited to a ceremony that was to be held in New York City facilitated with the traditions and medicines that called to my heart for the last decade, the Apache and the Huichol.  Spirit orchestrated the timing, as Spirit always does and on New Years Eve I found myself in a Tipi in a small park in the Bronx.  All time and space disappeared as the fire was tended, songs and prayers were sung and the Sacred was revered authentically in a Good Ways.

The next morning, on January 1, 2012, the Sun was bright and warm (unusual for this area this time of year).  I soaked more Light into my already open and filled Heartspace  on the 12th floor balcony of a highrise apartment building.   Greeted by Hawk, the message came from the question:

Is this glorious sun shiny day a projection of the Light that is in my Heart?  Are we that powerful?

Lighting up the City, Stamford CT 1/2/12

“We Come Together with All that is Good.  We hold Sacred Space in ways that have been passed on to us and for the future generations.  We have entered a time where we have the potential to manifest our true heart’s desires in an instant.   Believe in the power of  your Spirit.  The journey is what you choose it to be.  The Spirits of those who came before and those to come join you in Divine Orchestration.”

In that moment, in awe of the view before me; the city skyline showered by a bright Sun,  it occurred to me that scene before me might be a Projection of my own current experience….so much so that nature and the elements responded with a glorious, warm, sun shiny day.

I began to wonder, is this the simple Reality of a Beautiful day?  Or is this a Projection of the immense Light that is shining from our Hearts?

Just Show Up

September 26, 2011

Joshua Tree, 10:13 am

This past weekend I took myself on an adventure into the unknown with my only compass being “just show up”.  There, I met my family and friends and, in between, Spirit and nature reflected back the impact of our contributions.

This is a Love Note I wrote to all of those whom participated in the etchings of alignment and harmony into my grateful heart this past weekend***

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Like a child, I am remain in awe as the magic of divine orchestration has its way with us when our simplest expression is to just show up.

Since we met and have been in each others lives I have reached the true depths of meeting myself intimately and this past weekend with you was yet another experience that revealed how much our journey is of One Heart.  The continual evolution, growth and expansion of our glorious selves was/is continually confirmed as all of our senses are ignited when I look into your eyes, hug you, receive a massage from you, listen to you, speak my pain with you, catch up with you, see you, drum journey with you, laugh with you, wake up with you, receive your healing gifts, see and acknowledge your beauty and sexiness, cry with you, eat good food with you, hear your wisdom, receive your generosity, dance with you and be in love with you.

Last night I dreamt of Orb Weaver Spiders…..

Love of One Heart

In more ways than one

Coming together to weave

Spirals of desire

~Lisa Starr

I love you and may we continue to empower each other with Happiness; the vital force for good health and good life!

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

orb and a spiral weave

 

 

A message in there somewhere

Sunday July 24, 2011, Poway, 8:30ish am

In the last few weeks, the women in my immediate circle have been experiencing candida symptoms and bacterial infections. Although their cases
are individual, I see in the universal mapping that this discord is not isolated.
While working with a Joshua Tree local Shaman of  a couple of days ago, the messages revealed “lack of self worth, deceit, power control and suicide”.  Coyotes have howled their laughter almost nightly in the last week, “You think it is, but it isn’t.”

I would like to remind us to nurture ourselves, speak to the core truth, have faith and ask for help and support. The work we are doing on behalf of Earth Mother and on behalf of humanity is not going unnoticed.

Last night, after I navigated clear new waters of my role as a mother, I was guided to go to the ocean and listen to Grandmother speak from the whispers of the waves. Upon my arrival, I dipped my toes in the tepid salt water and blessed my crown, heart and belly with sprinkles of the Ocean Waters. “Sit and take in the Beauty.”

On my way back to Poway (where I have been invited to stay during my visits to San Diego), the roads are dark on this country road that is lined with small horse ranch homes and the valley is an official Wildlife Preserve.

I saw a four-legged in the distance which I first thought was a dog or coyote at the edge of a drive, “Probably sniffing the trash cans.” As I approached
cautiously a Doe stepped into the road in front of my car. I stopped. She looked ahead as if she were to go across the street but instead turned back to the driveway. I began to move forward, watching her go back to up the driveway and then her mate appeared. A Buck with a rack of mature antlers.

He came down the drive way and stood in front of my car. My mouth dropped open and I was in awe. After a minute or so, he decided to move back into the trees as I began to drive slowly down the road.  He took on a grand prance and disappeared into the woods.

Elder Sister, Brother Deer thank you for showing us the gentleness that is on the other side of having come through the cycles discord. “Breath.”

We are blessed to be alive!

Strength and Saddness

I am grounded
in my power
Leadership
Family
Goddess

"Strength and Saddness" photo by Gabriel

Confident in
my transparency
my authenticity
my truth

Then…..
those moments
of sadness
for those
I am in love
whom cannot meet me

I humbly
honor their journey
my power
my acceptance
of what is.