i got scared

July 13, 2012

July 11, 2012

i got scared

i got so scared

working numbers

digits

i got so scared

cause it wasn’t adding

up

i  got so scared

about it being

enough

i got so scared

i cried out for

help

i got so scared

i heard “pull yourself

together”

i  got so scared

and remembered to

pray

I got so scared

even though it’s all a

lie

Transition or Evolution?

January 2, 2011

January 1, 2011
Being on sabbatical and with all the recent holidays, this year I found little resonance to the typical activities and celebrations.  I relied on my muscle testing to guide me to be ok with just staying home with my kitties, curling up in a warm bed and watching a good movie. When I’m done with the movies, sometimes I just lie in bed allowing my mind to quiet and emotions to do whatever they do all with no judgement only allowance.

I fall asleep and wake up rested and bright.

One thing did occur to me in those moments of allowing. It seems that I have been in transition for seven years now. Growth and evolution… the journey….is it all one big giant transition?

Happy Solstice and as the world at large celebrates a New Year in Gregorian timing, I to will jump on the wagon for a ride in celebration for happiness, harmony, prosperity and Love.  From what I’ve been hearing it’s a ride into a New World of Peace and Coming Together.

Rock painting evolution and prophecy by Bear Rock Curing Magician, October 2010

Hopi pigments on Granite Rock

Hopi pigments were used for this painting which is located in Joshua Tree.  A desert tortoise made her presence as I sat in contemplation after I finished the painting.  The symbols represent my personal yet universal perspective and journey of this time in our evolution.

Honey Toast

December 30, 2010

11-8-10

Joshua Tree, CA

 

 

 

"Intensity" photograph by Gabriel

 

Honey butter toast

really raw honey.

The sweetness of being vulnerable.

Honey toast.

Honey toes.

Horny toads.

And Lemon hot water tea.

Hmmmmm…

Smack my lips!

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

I wrote this poem while I was sitting across the table from my beloved at the time.  I was relishing in my delightful buttered honey toast and hot lemon water as he stared away from me in his own place of contemplation.  The truth is there were unresolved issues between us that had yet to be communicated.

I suppose I had some sort of understanding and knowing that we were on the verge of clearing up the uneasiness since at that moment the intensity was at its peak.   The peak intensity is the threshold just before the completion within a life experience cycle and is a place of discomfort as our deep vulnerabilities are about to be unleashed.  A break through or healing is just moments away.  It has been my experience in this life’s journey that these intensities of experiences grows us into more of who we can be and how we become.

Such appropriate timing to be indulging in the sweetness and tartness of delectable comforts!